The approaching El Nino winter storm bearing down on Washington D.C., Baltimore and the Chesapeake Bay has already canceled my book signing 550 miles away in tony Grosse Pointe, Michigan.
I was scheduled to sign copies of Metro Detroit's High School Basketball Rivalries at the Barnes & Noble on Mack Avenue tomorrow at 2pm but all flights in and out of Baltimore and D.C. have already been scrubbed in lieu of the approaching storm, predicted to be 'paralyzing' to those of us in the footprint of the Beltway.
Of course, any amount of precipitation is paralyzing to these folks. School was canceled in Anne Arundel County Wednesday; For God sakes, there was 1.5 inches of fresh snow in the driveway when we woke up! When 22 to 25 inches fell in Annapolis beginning Friday, December 18 through Saturday, December 19, the same county canceled school on Monday...and Tuesday...and yes, Wednesday, too! Seriously, it takes five days to clear roads, driveways and sidewalks? This makes Michigan look like a lil' slice of heaven when it comes to snow removal.
These storms represent Armageddon to a lot of people in the Mid-Atlantic. Many stores ran out of toilet paper, milk and bread before the dinner hour yesterday. The local television stations are all up and running with their familiar storm trackers, storm of the year and basic 'Death Watch' mentality. Also, this just in -- several furniture stores are liquidating! Everything must go!
I just hope we survive at this point.
And don't even try to drive on the interstates and county roads in the snow, much less a rain storm, because the locals start white-knuckling it the minute it starts to sprinkle the windshield. Snow's tough, too. The week before the 22-inch mother of all storms, a couple inches of sloppy pancake batter started falling on a Saturday afternoon in Glen Burnie, Maryland. I was doing 62 mph in the right lane of southbound interstate 50/301 -- and passing everyone in the three lanes to my left. Last weekend it took me 90 minutes to drive to Philadelphia with no snow on the ground in the morning and three-and-a-half-hours to drive back at 4.pm. because it snowed a couple inches.
I wish I had a sign on the back of my car that read: "I'm from Michigan. I've seen snow. It's really not that big of a deal. Just get the hell out of my way..."
Pray for us...
~T.C. Cameron is waxing the shovel and gearing up for Armageddon in Annapolis, Maryland this weekend. Run for your lives! Save yourself while you still can! Follow me to freedom!
